PAX was awesome. At the end of the third day, I emerged penniless, exhausted and somewhat bewildered by the sheer amount of stuff that I had to take in. Oh yeah, and sorry to the other PAX attendees.

PAX is a gaming convention, so I am going to talk about the gaming things that I saw there, so if that really isn’t your cup of tea, you can skim on to something else. There is a picture! Of the back of my head! Bald and painted! Might want to skip to that I guess.

Before I go on, I should just say this: GAMER CANDY is not canceled! GAMER CANDY is still being updated weekly on Wednesdays! POOP IN BED is just something that Joel and I are doing on the side. Apparently a self-proclaimed “lone retard” (her words, not mine) was led to believe that Gamer Candy was being replaced by Poop in Bed. It is not. They will co-exist, like walruses and seaweed.

Back to PAX, several awesome highlights. I got to play Left 4 Dead. First impressions? ****ing INCREDIBLE. It exceeded my expectations by magnificent amounts. The downside is now I am about five times more excited for it. November 20th feels decades away. Before it felt like years. DAMN YOU PUBLIC PLAYTEST! I also got to talk to an environmental designer from Valve, who was able to answer some questions that I had.

We attended a number of panels, most of which were Gabe and Tycho on stage answering questions. Good stuff, highly entertaining.

The exhibition hall was intense, like literally intense. There were so many people, so many things, it was great. So many freaking lines. I think we spent about 70% of the time at PAX waiting in lines, but with a group of friends and three DSes, it was a bonding experience. Plus we also got some killer seats and actually were able to play the demos.

After seeing some of my friends return with rich bounties of magic cards from the Wizards of the Coast booth, I learned to play while waiting in line and soon had a deck of my own. Now I am an even bigger nerd. I am just sliding down this slippery slope.

Another cool thing was the booth for Brothers in Arms: Hell’s Highway. It was set up like a military tent, with sandbags surrounding it, and actors dressed up as American soldiers, even sporting authentic 1940s infantry uniforms patrolled the perimeters of the booth, model M1 Garands slung over their shoulders. Intrigued, and a fan of the series and anticipating the game, I approached and saw attendees getting fake tattoos sprayed on their arms, and then I saw someone sitting in a chair getting their head shaved. An attendee. This truly peaked my interest. I approached and saw a sign proclaiming something truly delightful:

“GET A HELLCUT AND GET A COPY OF HELL’S HIGHWAY FREE!”

Just then, as if the universe was urging me on, a slight breeze wafted over my bare scalp. I am already bald! All I would have to do is have the little hairs on my head shaved and have “HELL” painted on the back of my head.

And so . . . after two hours of waiting . . . I was rewarded for my patience.

I think that the best part about this picture is how the background looks dark. The room was actually very light. The seemingly darkened background, combined with the flash causes my flouresently white skin to appear even paler. Fortunately the paint came off very easily, and I was able to scrub it off as soon as I got back. Now I don’t have to pay $60 for a game! I guess you really can put a pricetag on dignity!

Finally, we tried out a new game on Xbox Live Arcade called Castle Crashers that was just released. It is a super cool side-scrolling adventure game designed for co-op with 2-4 players. It is incredible, with a similar feel to Four Swords. It must be purchased and played. Now.

I am returning to the hospital again this week, and so it is now looking like a new Poop in Bed will not be ready for Friday. I don’t even know how I am going to get next week’s Gamer Candy done, but it shall happen! I swear to you!

Enjoy yourselves. (Not like that.)